Internetless

I'm internetless! Well, obviously not this instant: right now I'm using a computer in C. House to make this post. But at home my broadband died on Saturday afternoon and hasn't come back yet. Argh! It's driving me potty. It doesn't appear to be anything at my end that's the problem, and my ISP has checked everything at their end as well. So it looks like it's a problem on the phone line disrupting my ability to connect. :-( I don't know how long it'll be until I get back online from home again. What's almost worse about this is that I only had my broadband upgraded (for the same price I was paying already, mwahah) to glorious speeds only last week. And now, kersplat! No internets at ALL. I don't think it's related to the upgrade - it was working fine for several days, and I technically have a perfectly good connection still. I just can't connect to my actual ISP. Apparently it's a line fault, so BT have got to check it out. Let's hope it doesn't take too long.

On the plus side, I've got loads of knitting done - I'm pretty much done on the gusset of my Hedara sock, having started from the ribbing just a few days ago. I can't believe how fast it's gone! And while I've been knitting, I've been catching up on season 1 of Alias, which I haven't watched for ages and ages. But today I'm having withdrawal, so it's back to the internets I come. However, there are other people waiting to use these machines, and even though I'm a speedy typer, I have other stuff to do. So I'd better get going. Let's hope I'll be back soon!

Where was I?

Both figuratively / mentally and literally.... um.... yes. My train of everything is well and truly lost! Let's try and get back on track, shall we? This is probably going to be a massively long post, I warn you now! There's also going to be a fair bit about mental health stuff, so feel free to skim :-)

So, starting from when I vanished back in December... well, for the three weeks leading up to Christmas I was pretty much knitting constantly. So much so that I cramped up my shoulder and ended up with an ouch-y left index finger joint! But eek, I had to get the Christmas knitting done!!! Well, as I already mentioned, I didn't quite succeed, but I did get Mum's Fetchings done, and I had a scarf finished that I gave her as well. Also within that time, I went to visit C for the weekend, and having been manic not too long beforehand, I think I 'overworked' myself, because once I got home again, I when I wasn't knitting, I was sleeping. Zzzz!

Then, this site was down from 17th - 26th-ish December because of a server crash. It took the hosting company a while to be able to recreate the accounts and then restore the files. The flat files were about 6 weeks old but the databases were all up to date, so I've been able to easily restore the things that were still missing (photos, mainly). So that's all good. Of course, during that time I had a million posts I wanted to make, and now I don't remember what they were about ;-)

After Christmas, I crashed like a .... crashed out thing for a good ten days. Everyone tends to, I think, but annoyingly I can't do anything by halves, so I hit a depressive slump with it: didn't get up or eat or anything really. I slept, or I read - I got through about 15 books, actually. But mostly I slept. Luckily, I'd arranged with Clara, Ally & co. for them to come over for New Year's. If I hadn't, I wouldn't have done anything for that... and if I'd been up to phoning them to cancel, I probably would have. But as it happened, Clara rang me and just asked me what time they should turn up. I don't think she knew I was down, but that really is the best way to deal with me when I'm like that. Don't leave me room to get out of things! So I pulled myself together, tidied up, and sorted out some nibbles and the like. We had a good time - just a chilled out evening, chatting and playing with little M. :-) After that, I was still down for a few more days, but I started to pull up again at the weekend after C helped me with a plan to get me firing on all cylinders again. Hooray!

Since then, I've posted my resolutions, which I'm doing OK with in general, and I've started Project 365. Mentally, I've cycled into a more manic phase, but overall I've been mostly within 'normal' parameters. I've also done something that I'd been sort of putting off for some time - I've gone and registered with the drop-in centre down the road. I think I was resisting it because part of me felt that only people with a "real disability" needed to go to somewhere like that. Or perhaps with a more severe disability than I like to perceive myself having, I don't know. Ah, denial! I thought I was over you, but no! Anyway, it's a really nice place, and I can go there as often as I want or need, to use whatever facilities I want to. Mainly, I think it'll be useful for me to have somewhere to pop in when I know that I'm starting to slide one way or another and need to just be around other people to ground myself, and also it's good to know that the support and advice services are there if I need them. And I have to admit that it's a huge plus that it's literally a minute's walk (or less) from my front door. They do food too, very reasonably, so if I can't cook, I can eat there. And I got to chat with three other people with bipolar while I was there, and it's just kind of nice to have that face to face contact with others in the same boat. So yes. I'm going to keep that up.

Hmm, I think that kind of covers it. I've been working away on my WIPs, but I'll talk more about that in a different post (with progress pics, whee). Oh, and I seem to have my sleeping pattern back to normal, so it's back to the gym and everything this week as well. I missed Knit & Natter the Saturday before last, but my friend M is coming over tomorrow, and I'm planning to go this coming weekend. Now all I have to do is stick to the plan, but also not overdo it!

I Am Seven!

Oh hey, I nearly forgot! It's my Blogoversary today - seven years, can you believe it? Not that I've been 'active' the whole time, but when I haven't been here I've generally been on my Livejournal, so I have actually been blogging away ever since January 2001.

So anyhow, thanks to Ornery's Wife and Marsha who both stopped by with blogoversary wishes. I appreciate it!

I would wonder if this is when I should expect the seven year itch to set in, but I've been a terrible, unfaithful blogger this whole time: going from Blogger to Greymatter and now to Movable Type, platform-wise. And let's not even talk about my ongoing flirtation with Wordpress, and my mad affair with Livejournal. Tut tut tut! But while LJ might be my virtual social and fandom hang-out (it's the whole friends-list thing, you see), I reckon I'll always come back to this blog, because ....it's home. *cue cheesy music* ;-) And, you know, on my own server and personal domain name and all that stuff.

For some reason, even though I started my LJ less than a year after this, it feels like I've had this blog a lot longer. Perhaps because even after I'd started the LJ, I still mainly used this until my manager at work told me off for mentioning people at work in it. Perhaps because I've had the domain itself since about '99. Whatever it is, I'm glad I still kept this blog up even when I wasn't using it, so that it was here for me to return to now that I have my knitting to ramble on about. Yep. Seven years. That's a good number.

Project 365 #1 - Day 1-6: 10th - 15th Jan

I mentioned in my last post that I was thinking about doing Project 365. A couple of days later I decided that if I was going to do it, then I'd better just start before I started thinking about it too much. So I did.

Which means that I will, all going well, be posting a photograph for every day from 10th January 2008 to 9th January 2009. I'm planning to make a post every five days or so. In actual fact, I might post more than one photo for some days - this is to stop myself getting mired in indecision! I've set up a specific folder in the photo album for the set of photos to go in, as well. I won't be putting them on Flickr or adding them to any group sets there, though I have joined the Ravelry group for 365-ers, and I'm intending to join the webring.

Anyway, that's enough rambling on the theory. On to the photos (click 'em for the full size versions):

Day 1 - 10th Jan 08

This is me trying to take a decent modelled photo of the socks my lovely SP11 pal, Janey, made me. Tucking my jeans up? Oh dear, won't be trying that again! Don't worry Janey, I think I managed to get a better view in the end! Also, look (you might need to click through to the full size pic): among the mess in the background are my faithful DMs, the box for my shiny new webcam (xmas pressie), and the bookshelf that I have my back to when I'm at the computer. Can you see the wee dye-cast TARDIS on the top? *unashamed fangirl*

Day 2 - 11th Jan

Xandermog, faaaaaast asleep on the sofa. Awww :-) See, I said this would all be yarn / knitting and cat pics, didn't I?

Day 3 - 12th Jan

This is actually fairly indicative of my day. See, I was all ready to go out: I had all my stuff in my bag to go to Knit & Natter, and here are my shoes ready and waiting to be put on. Only, they stayed right there. I came over kind of woozy and didn't go anywhere at all. Bah.
This pic also gives you an idea of the layout of some of my living room: it's a pretty large room, so I have it kind of split up into areas. I took the pic from the doorway, so you can see through to the computer, and also the back of the sofa which makes a division into the 'telly / music' bit.

Day 4 - 13th Jan

Ah yes, the reason for the previous day's wooziness. The oncoming storm. "Hi I can't sleep and everything is HYSTERICALLY FUNNY!!!!" mania. I would say I was five, except even at five years old I was generally a serious child with my nose in a book. On the plus side here, I wrote it down on this mood diary sheet and later recorded it on the chart thingy I have, and I was able to be online and talk to some friends, which grounded me somewhat until I came over tired enough that I conked out. (Taken w/ the webcam)

Day 5 - 14th Jan

I was still riding the mania, but I had had some sleep during the day and I'd come down enough that I could be productive... although I wasn't able to actually make a decision about what to do! Luckily, my friend suggested that if I wasn't going to be able to sleep that night, I should use the time and sort out my paperwork. So I did! This is me about half done. About 2/3 of the paper ended up in the recycling (orange bag) - hoorah!

OH NOES PAPERCUT!!!! See, sorting through all that paper has its dangers. I sliced myself right on the web of the thumb, and it kept pulling as I was still sorting stuff out, so I needed to bung a plaster over it... and of course, the only one I could find was this unnecessarily large thing. Typical.

Day 6 - 15th Jan

Once I'd sorted the paperwork, it all got neatly filed away. Isn't that nice? Although, this photo also tells you what a packrat I am. There's still all my stuff from uni in there, for heaven's sake. And in fact, that Tigger folder was my school folder when I was doing GCSEs. Oh dear...

Of course, I can't do anything without the mog coming to check up on me. Dreadful nosy beast! (And, why yes, that is the box for a Laser Screwdriver down there on the right. The bro gave me one for Christmas to go with the Sonic Screwdriver he got me a couple of years back. Hee! (See above re. *unashamed fangirl*) Mmmm, John Simm.)

Really, he's a very good cat, but his one main vice is shredding my furniture. And walls. Quite often while pretending he's not really doing it at all (hence him not looking at the door or me in this pic). *sigh* And while he hasn't shredded the inside of this cupboard door, he's now decided that the outside of it is his new favourite scratching post.... :-/

And that's that for now. Next five days coming soon...

It was. Only. A dream!

Sitting on the bus this afternoon, I suddenly remembered a dream I'd had last night. In which my skeins of sock yarn were just so irresistibly yummy that I just had to chew on them*. Nom nom nom! Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarn!!! This is the point where I should probably be saying "I think I've finally cracked". Only, whoops, too late! ;-)

* They weren't bad tasting, either. Not that I ate them. That would be a waste! Just stuffed them in my mouth and gently chomped down a couple of times. Erm. Hi there subconscious. Something you want to tell me?

ANYWAY! Hi, Happy New Year. Here I am! I've been pretty zonked since Christmas, and I was rushed off my feet before that (plus my webserver was down for over a week, grr), but I'll elaborate on what I actually got up to in the other post that I'm writing. This is going to be a looking forwards post. Well, and a 'currently' one as well, I guess.

So, let's have some resolutions for 2008. I have general ones, and knitting-related ones as well:

General resolutions:

1. Get back into a regular day-to-day routine and maintain my sleep hygiene regime
2. Remember to take my meds (I've been doing well with this for some time, but it never hurts to reinforce it!)
3. Related to #1, go to the gym / gym classes regularly and often.
4. Eat proper!
5. Get back to work, but take it slowly and don't overdo it!
6. Keep a cap on my spending and improve my money situation overall.
7. Have a thorough clear-out of the flat and charity-shop or eBay anything I don't want or need.
8. Be a more reliable and prompt correspondent! I'm pants at replying to emails and comments, and I really want to get on top of that. Feel free to help me out by prodding me if I should be mailing you and haven't. I'm not ignoring you, I'm just a bit rubbish!

Several of which can really be summed up as "Look after myself", but since detailed lists help me plan, that's what we've got. :-)

Knitting Resolutions:

1. Two words: Yarn Diet. This is strongly related to #6 above, since I can't now afford to buy any more yarn - woe! But I'm not exactly yarnless, so I'm not going to repine. I haven't decided on my exact goal for this yet, but I want to join the Stashalong thingy. Piglottie has said she's not going to buy any yarn in 2008 at all. I'd like to say the same, but maybe I'll start with a 6 month commitment and then revise / renew it from there! I feel that I should leave myself some wiggle-room just in case, and there's still sockclub. So. I'll post more about it when I've figured out how I want to work it.
2. Knit from my stash. You know, since I'm not going to be buying anything new. But even if I was, I have a ginormous stash that needs some serious busting, and what's more, it's yarn I really want to knit with! I have plans!
3. Those two UFOs that have been needing sewing up for the last couple of years? FINISH THEM! Damnit. At least one, if not both, by the end of February.
4. Never have more than 8 WIPs on the needles. Preferably less, to leave room for 'OMG must start that right now' syndrome.
5. In the short term, finish all my current WIPs by the end of March (Hedaras, Damson Gloves, Ruby Scarf, Clapotis, Fireworks socks, Chevron Scarf, WFS, Spring Sprung scarf, and SAHWWJ Cardi) with a possible waiver on the cardi because I'm happy enough for that to be a relatively long-term no-rush project.
6. Do some more stash clearing / yarn selling. Which sort of counts as stash busting, but not exactly. Also advertise those knitting books and magazines.
7. Get out the knitting machine and make up some stuff to sell. Like HP scarves and so on. I've got the yarn, after all. Stashbusting! Yay!
8. Spend more time on my Ravelry groups, and keep up with my blogroll links. And comment more! Oh, on the podcasts I listen to, as well. Par-ti-ci-pate. *nod*

I've also been thinking about joining Project 365. Or maybe I'll do the weekly variant that some people on Ravelry are doing. I'll probably end up with a stack of photos of the cat. And yarn. No change there, then!

Okeydokey, this post is long enough. I'll yatter about my current WIPs (with photos) more tomorrow or some time soon. Time for bed! :-)